The 28th & 1st; Secret Surprise Day!

The 28th of February. 

Happy Secret Surprise Day! Looking back, I actually booked this in August, so well done me for having the foresight to check so far in advance. 

No entertainment on the trains this morning, just the policeman I saw surreptitiously tucking a spoon into his jacket. Was he expecting some kind of cereal emergency later on? I will never know. 

The Euston chap arrived promptly with the ramp, so Christine wasn’t waiting to meet us for long. We all got in the lift, and went down to the taxi rank, where I asked the taxi driver to take us to The Ritz! Surprise!

The doorman had to get a minion to let us in (ramp issues), so we got to go in the back way, seeing the private cars parked there (including an orange/gold Bentley 4×4 with the numberplate “I GLO” which was hideous) and the “private quarters” on the way to the afternoon tea area. Our coats were taken, and then I rather awkwardly had to take the arm of the maître’d as he took us to our table, because I am obviously infirm. 

We sat in the corner, so I oversaw the rest of the diners, and Mommy and Christine watched the people who were having some sort of reception behind me – honours were being given out at the palace today and we think Kirsty Young may have received one. Unfortunately, to confirm, I would have had to turn around (and quite blatantly stare) so we were forced to speculate. 

We ordered our teas (I was intrigued by a chocolate mint one, but settled on Assam Tippy Orthodox, so it wouldn’t fight any food flavours). 

The tea stand arrived, full of sandwiches and cakes. It’s a funny procedure – you eat your sandwiches (ham with grain mustard mayonnaise on sliced brioche, cheddar cheese with chutney on tomato bread, cucumber with cream cheese, dill and chives on granary bread, chicken breast with parsley cream on malt bread, scottish smoked salmon with lemon butter on sourdough bread and egg mayonnaise with chopped shallots on white bread), then when they are gone, they bring you more, plus the (still warm) scones with jam and cream. Scones are the best part – when they break apart without the need of a knife, they are perfect. I hate jam, but I like a very thin layer of cream, so it’s like butter. 

The cakes were a tad disappointing, but that was only in my opinion, because they all contained cream and/or some kind of fruity crap, which I do not like. Thankfully, my experience was saved by the cake trolley which came round, and I had a slice of chocolate and hazelnut loaf i.e. Nutella cake. 

By the end of this, we were all suitably stuffed, and we had to vacate the table by 3.15, so we retrieved our coats from the cloakroom and get one of the many waiting cabs to the V&A. 

We arrived a little early for our allocated slot in the Undressed exhibition, so we wandered around the free area, looking at the tombs of knights and stained glass until it was time to go to the fashion gallery. The exhibition was all about the history of underwear, so started from the earliest forms of corsets, up until the present day, which included the waist trainer. Funny how things come full circle like that. There were also historical pyjamas, dressing gowns, underwear as outerwear – Kate Moss’ infamous see-through dress was there, and one of Dita von Teese’s corsets. There was a beautiful gold crocheted dress; something I would love to be able to make. 

When we were finished with the exhibition, we had a chat about what to do next, and it seemed that the most sensible thing would be to stay at the museum until it closed, looking around the rest of the free exhibitS, when we would get a cab back to Euston. 

So for an hour we bimbled about, looking at Raphael’s cartoons (not that kind of cartoon) and learning about Lockwood Kipling, father of Rudyard, but a man of whom I had never heard. 

When we left the museum, Christine went to get the tube home, and Mommy and I climbed into another waiting taxi. Very lucky with them today. Then it took us a good half an hour to get back to Euston, where we purchased magazines and beverages, then took up our usual spot in the assistance office until it was time for our train. 

No waiting in the cold on the platform today, and no delays getting back, so this time we were home by half past nine and I am happy to have given Mommy a nice birthday treat. 

The 1st of March.

Argh. Had Zopiclone last night but it did no good, just feel crap today without having had any extra sleep. Breathing has been dreadful. 

Mommy and I were both at the chiro this morning, with her going first. When it came to my turn, I got her to work on the thing that happens across my back when I lie on my right side (which I have to do to sleep), and she stretched out the abdominal muscle that has been spasming multiple times every day. We shall see tonight if it’s had any effect. 

This afternoon, I’ve been writing about yesterday, trying to talk to Imelda/anybody that can tell me what’s happening with my arm, and agonising about the Old Hallfieldian Society meeting tonight. My breathing has been so awful that I really didn’t feel like I could face it, but I didn’t want to be the reason behind another cancelled meeting because there wasn’t a quorum. 

I decided I would go, and if they needed me, I would stay. Then, when Celia answered the door, she said just to stay for half an hour while Mommy read the paper. So I stayed for most of the agenda, not contributing much but that didn’t matter.

Now, back home, and I’m going to have pancakes.  

The 26th & 27th; I’m still feeling like I need to lie down.

The 26th of February. 

Another bad sleep! Well, it took me ages to fall asleep, but then I did at least stay that way. I got up and went downstairs in my pyjamas so I could give Mommy her card and presents before she had to go and take Grandma to coffee morning. She loves the earrings and is very intrigued by all the different recipes in The Little Book of Scones. When she came back, she opened the rest of her stuff which was mini loaf tins and recipes to go with them, and lots of teas from Hilary and Jeremy so she’s basically got an afternoon tea kit!

We went out to Miller & Carter for lunch. I decided to only have a main course because they’re quite large and my stomach would not cope with a starter too. I was right because I didn’t finish my meal anyway! I ate my steak and sweet potato fries but I couldn’t fit the rest in. 

When we were finished, we took Grandma home, then had a quick trip to M&S to get a birthday cake because for the first time in living memory, we have not had time to make one! We’ve had a phone call from Christine to say Happy Birthday, and I’m still feeling like I need to lie down. 

The 27th of February. 

I have been sleepy all day because I had two Zopiclone last night so when my alarm went off, I did not want to get out of bed. I had to though, because I needed coffee and that was downstairs. 

I made it and spent the morning reading the interesting bits of the paper like the story about Ginger Nuts returning to circulation which is obviously the most important one. 

The rest of the day has been TiVo/Netflix. I finished the baby blanket I was doing for Sheila so I can give that to her at an opportune moment, and I might start on the next outfit for the doll soon. Schoolgirl or pyjamas?

Becky and James have been over, although James only very briefly, and now Becky’s school has some chambers underground which are being leaked into and may or may not have asbestos? Fun times. I also lent her my Harry Potter wand and Gryffindor scarf so she can be Hermione for World Book Day at school. Obviously. 

The 21st & 22nd; Happy Birthday to me!

The 21st of January. 

Happy Birthday to me!

It’s also a year since I stopped steroids today and the difference in my face is insane.

I had some Nutella on toast for breakfast before I started opening my presents and cards. Carol had sent me the book about A Streetcat Named Bob, Auntie Hilary had sent a Lars Kepler book, and an Amazon voucher to buy the 5th book in the series when it comes out in May. Mommy and Daddy had bought me a necklace and the “perishables” was some macarons from Macarons & More, super tasty!

We went out late morning to do some shopping, and I got some cashmere socks, merino wool and silk socks, and a pair of leather trousers all half price! Daddy and Christine both phoned to wish me a Happy Birthday, and we came home for about half an hour before going out to pick up Grandma to go to Harvey Nichols for afternoon tea. 

We met Daddy in the car park, and were a little bit early so had a little bimble around the shop before going into the champagne bar/restaurant for our tea. I had an egg sandwich and a cream cheese and cucumber sandwich, one and a half scones (which were incredibly good, even if I did throw half of one on the floor) and a chocolate delice. I was also presented with a glass of champagne, Grandma gave me the Happy Birthday charm from Pandora, and Mommy and Daddy gave me a pair of diamond earrings and I was floored, not expecting that at all. 

Tonight, we’re having birthday cake and more champagne with Becky and James. Happy girl. I am so lucky. 

The 22nd of January. 

Happy Birthday pt. 2!

Early start for our trip to London! Arrived at New Street at 10, bought coffee and paper, then barely had time to get settled in the assistance area before the chap came to take us to the train! On the journey, I had to cope with a girl having to vomit in the toilet near me several times, and I saw two girls with four blue WKDs who I was glad not to be seated near. 

Got a cab very quickly and he took us to The Savoy. The doorman did something to the door so we could get through the rotating panels with the wheelchair, then we sat on some large pouffes while waiting for Christine. She emerged somewhat weather-worn and relieved to sit down, then regaled us with tales of her stressful morning. She’d had plans to go to all sorts of cake shops, then arrange them in a box for me. There hadn’t quite been time, so I got them in there own bags/boxes. She got me a vanilla bean and a chocolate truffle doughnut from Crosstown, an Oreo cheesecake crodough from Timberyard, a zebra crodough from Harrods, and a s’more from Cutter & Squidge! All that PLUS a Moomin make up bag and notebook. She is the best. 

Onto foods! Started with champagne (again). Mommy and Christine had the same four course Escoffier menu, which meant a came to explain each dish they were having. We all had the same starter, the glazed omelette Arnold Bennett, and I can totally understand why he ate it every day – it’s fucking delicious. Then Mommy and Christine got a ravioli while Daddy and I munched on bad. The main courses arrived soon after, and I had an excellent steak on the rare side of medium-rare, and I was very pleased that they left the peppercorn sauce on the side, otherwise I wouldn’t have been able to eat it. 

I knew I wouldn’t fit in a pudding, so after watching Mommy and Christine’s sour cherries get flambéed, I went to investigate the toilets. They were incredibly fancy – I love a place where you dry your hands on a flannel then chuck it in a bin. I also had no qualms about taking a selfie or two in the big mirror. Upon my return, our coffee was being served, so we drank that while we ate the tiny extra desserts, paid, and said goodbye. 

Our plan was to go to Picturehouse Central, because Christine is a member, so we went to see The Big Short with 3 discounted tickets and one free for me! We sat on the back row of sofas and wrapped up in blankets because the heating was on the blink. The film is so good, so important, but entertaining as well. It made me hate everyone including myself (because at one point I was rooting for the guys who wanted the economy to fail). It also made me want to squirrel all my money away in suitcases  

We still had an hour before we needed to get back to Euston, so we sat in the café downstairs where I was refreshed with an orange juice and we saw Adrian Chiles from football. We were lucky and grabbed a cab very promptly, from a cabbie whose daughter is at Birmingham Uni. At Euston, the others bought some food (I was still full from lunch), then we saw Paddy McGuinness as we were heading to assistance. Daddy had been complaining about not having seen any famous people while we were at The Savoy and now we’d seen two!

The train home was packed. I listened to St. Paul and the Broken Bones and was very chilled out. 

The 14th & 15th; My heart is broken.

The 14th of August.

My heart is broken. This morning all the doctors came and said that the scan will be tomorrow, have to be nil by mouth from 5am in case it’s in the morning, fluids overnight. They said I could go home until 10pm if I wanted to, so when Mommy arrived, I told her not to bring anything in up as the doctors had just been.

So she came up and I told her what they said, then she told me that Oscar died this morning! My kitty, oh my kitty. My parents found him this morning and he wasn’t right, and they took him to the vet and he had to go to sleep. He’ll be cremated and put in a box and we’ll decide what to do. But I didn’t get to say goodbye. I am devastated.

And then I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t want to go home and I didn’t want to stay here, so we went and had afternoon tea at Selfridges and buy some chocolate and came back to try and make a kitty montage.

My Oscar is gone. I’m not going to be able to sleep.

The 15th of August.

Well I’m home, as promised, but I’m not scanned, as also promised.

I didn’t go to sleep until the fluids had gone up which was past midnight, and I had to be nil by mouth from five, so I’d set an alarm for half past four which I woke up before. So I had about an hour of sleep before I had to eat my pretzel and drink my juice, and then there were things happening on the ward so I was done.

I was told I was second on the list so I put my gown on, then at about half ten the nurse came to tell me that there’d been an emergency on the table and I’d been cancelled, so I had to wait to chat to the doctors who would be round shortly but then I could go.

So being there was a waste of time and I could’ve said goodbye to Oscar. Okay I can’t write about this because I just spent ten minutes buried in Mommy’s shoulder, sobbing hysterically. Frankly, everything is terrible: my face looks like a moth, and when the bruising disappears, I’ll still have a moon face, the steroids are still too high for my liking, I’m losing weight which I don’t want to do but I’m terrified to eat anything because everything I consume seems to make me burp for hours, my arms are full of fluid which makes my skin really tight and sore so it keeps breaking, and lying down really hurts, my scan got cancelled, and my cat is dead.

I don’t know when the scan might be now, but I’m at clinic on Wednesday again so if we’ve heard nothing by them, we’ll get it chased. We left the QE at about half one, and went to BCH to visit Oliver and Fran and William and Sarah who all happen to be on Ward 8. Oliver’s skin looks so sore, the poor mite. We just talked about everything that’s going on, and we saw Sarah Lawson and Alison from BMT team! So some extra unexpected catch-ups.

We had a look at men’s cardigans because none of mine are big enough to accommodate my arms, and I managed to find one.

Faye, her husband and band on kitties have sent me beautiful flowers.

 

The 10th & 11th; Such a splendid weekend, I am loathe to have not been able to escape normal life for longer.

The 10th of August.
Oh, what a delightful day. I am writing this in the guest room of casa del Heidi, which is a converted loft and it’s just adorable.
Mommy and I set off at midday, arriving twenty minutes later than I planned which felt awfully stressful at the time and my my phone couldn’t find us and I was convinced we were just lost. It was all okay in the end though (evidently). We found her house (after getting her to come out and wave) and were greeted by Henry, the very friendly big dog. He is gorgeous.
I gave Emma the book and some nail varnishes which she appeared happy with – I gave her Feeling Sorry for Celia by Jaclyn Moriarty, which was one of my favourites when I was her age. I could re-read it now and still love it.

We had warm beverages and ginger biscuits which were scrummy, then the four ladies went for afternoon tea at Lucknam Park while Pip stayed behind and did something with Screwfix tools. Emma and I went into the hotel and got sat down while Mommy and Heidi parked. It is very difficult to act polite and posh with people when you look like you’ve been partaking in some very thuggish behaviour. The bruising is still spreading down my face, and now it looks like I have some really odd, dark dimples.

We had two afternoon teas and an extra cream tea between us (for extra scones) which we quite successfully demolished, only taking a few cakes and one scone away in a box. The waiter took a photo of the four of us, cutting my face neatly in half with the cake stand. I had a smoked salmon and cream cheese sandwich and half of one that I think contained tomato, wargh. Then I had two scones and a carrot cake, then we startin to get rather full and have been burping ever since. I have eaten many deflatine, and I do seem to have stopped burping in time to go to sleep.

Tonight we watched Raiders of the Lost Ark which I’ve never seen before. It is essentially a long string of convenient coincidences, and the main Nazi reminded me of the torturer who got killed in the first episode of this series of Utopia. Then it was the final of Child Genius which Heidi hasn’t seen, but by the end was vastly emotionally invested in and by the end, we were all applauding Sharon’s victory.

Now it is bedtime! Tomorrow we do Bath in the rain.

The 11th of August.

Such a splendid weekend, I am loathe to have not been able to escape normal life for longer. At least, what my life deems “normal”. I had a decent sleep, despite the dream I had in which I got murdered, and Pip made some coffee and we had Richard Bertinet toast with marmalade for breakfast.

Mommy, Heidi and I went to pick up Emma from her Dad’s, then we drove into Bath. Some of the views are just stunning. If I could cope with hills, I’d to live there. We went to Colonna and Smalls as was recommended by Twitter, and I had a brief chat with Rachel’s brother-in-law. Everybody deferred to my coffee knowledge so we all the same flat white, then we went to Heidi’s favourite bookshop in the world, called Mr. B’s Emporium of Reading Delights (you can tell it’s good already) where I bought only three (ha!) books but I’d love to go back and do one of their reading spas, then you get allocated a person who sends you books in this wonderful bespoke service.

We then went to a special kitchen shop where we got disposable piping bags and some pretty cupcake cakes, then got caught in a brief rain shower on the way to lunch. We had it in a place called The Adventure Cafe, where my bagel was so full, I had to deconstruct it to make eating it feasible. Then we went to The Fashion Museum and Assembly rooms, where they had an exhibition of clothing from WWI, and it was all very beautiful and fascinating. I took a couple of photos of pieces I thought were special.

After that, it was time to go back to Heidi’s, then home. We stopped at the destination services in Gloucester on the way back, and I had a really good fudgy blondie, which was really tasty and especially satisfying as I haven’t had a good blondie in a really long time.

My facial bruising is now spreading down my face and I feel that I look like a moth, although Daddy has taken to calling me Rorschach. Also, my arms have suddenly gone incredibly “boggy” again (that is the technical term) and I have my suspicions as to why, but I need scans, so I think I may be getting admitted either tomorrow or on Wednesday after my second ECP session on Wednesday.

Never rest.

The 19th & 20th; Much more successful day.

The 19th of March.

Much more successful day. I slept all night, got up at eight and came downstairs to have my breakfast and start the backup of the laptop, before getting Mommy to wash my hair. I was (optimistically, I admit) hoping it might be mostly done by the time I got back downstairs. In actual fact, it didn’t finish until some time mid-afternoon, when I was then able to move on to the next stage! Still not quite finished, but a lot more progress has been made.

I chased the nasty black and white cat out of the garden this morning after I noticed Oscar lying very flat on the bridge and staring at a spot I couldn’t see. I opened the back door, started to walk towards him and I saw the evil cat climbing up and over the fence. Prick. I coaxed Oscar back inside and we had a little hug.

Tomorrow is Mommy’s Harrods birthday treat! Such fun.

The 20th of March.

Mommy birthday trip day! The trains were not fun but the time in Harrods was lovely.

Our train down was delayed so we arrived in London an hour later than planned, but we still got to Harrods in time for our one o’clock reservation. Mommy had the Georgian blend and I had the Assam Gold. Then all the foods came! A lobster and prawn mousse in a brioche bun, and finger sandwiches of beef and onion marmalade, smoked salmon and truffle, egg mayonnaise, and my first ever cucumber sandwich. It was an interesting texture experience. Then we each ate our plain scones (we brought the sultana scones home – they were so massive!), then cakes! We decided to eat the fragile ones and bring the more robust ones home, so we ate the teeny weeny lemon meringue tarts and the millefeuille, and we brought home the chocolate hazelnut delices, the raspberry macarons, and the pieces of fruit cake.

We didn’t get Mommy’s present because we decided there wasn’t time, so we looked at the ridiculously expensive toys, then we went to the food halls. I bought some of Mommy’s tea, some chocolate Dorotea biscuits, and some William Curley chocolates. Then there wasn’t much time before we had to go back to Euston!

We were on a London Midland service back (never doing that again), and Daddy picked us up and it is warm sleepy bed time.

The 1st & 2nd; Today was muchas driving and Betty’s!

The 1st of March.

Today was muchas driving and Betty’s!

We set off at half nine-ish, and about fifty minutes into the journey, I realised that I’d forgotten my phone. I was made to feel even more of a dickhead (only by myself) because Mommy forgot hers yesterday so I made a point to her about remembering to take it with her as she was going shopping, then left mine behind. Dickhead.

So we drove to Harrogate, stopping at Woodall for coffee, and when we went in, the traffic was fine, but when we came out, it was awful! There had been a three-car accident just ahead so everyone had to slow down to go around it/stare. Becky got quite stressed with thinking we’d be late, so once we got through the traffic, she rang them and in the end, we were only about ten minutes late.

We arrived and did not join the queue, we just went in and up the stairs where they took our coats and we took our seats. Becky and I had a glass of champagne, while James looked around the room in awe. We chose our teas (I had the China Yunnan), then the tea and food arrived! There were four finger sandwiches of egg and cress, prawn and smoked salmon, ham and mustard and coronation chicken, then we had two mini sultana scones, then of the cakes, I had a chocolate salted caramel macaron and chocolate gateaux. They were perfectly delicious. We then bought some cakes and fat rascals (inevitably), then bimbled a bit around Harrogate. We saw many fun dogs.

Then we drove home! We stopped at Woodall again and I rang home to give them an idea of when I’d get home. Then we bombed home, blasting the Frozen soundtrack. Good day.

The 2nd of March.

Did not want to get up this morning but I felt like I’d slept as long as was socially acceptable. I got downstairs just as Mommy and Daddy were heading out to take Grandma to church. I made some toast and watched Sunday Brunch while I edited the photos that I took on Becky’s phone yesterday. I also read the weekend Guardian that I didn’t get chance to look at yesterday.

This afternoon, I ate some soup and watched Hostages (I do love its air of faint ridiculousness), then I watched a couple of medical documentaries I’d recorded on BBC4 – one about endocrinology and one about the foot. I preferred the one about the dissection of the hand – feet are just not as interesting to me. Plus they are somewhat unattractive.

We had an early dinner of roasted duck at half five, and now I’m half-watching Family Fortunes while doing this and contemplating what book I’m going to read next. I think The Goldfinch.